Last week, I had a chance to conduct user interviews after quite a while. I loved any minute of it. There is nothing more rewarding (for me) than spending two hours with people I never met before (and probably I will never meet again) trying to understand the world from their point of view.
In those two hours and from the first few seconds, my attention is totally focused on the other person. I observe how they enter the room, how they look at me, and how they shake my hand; I need to understand anything I can about their personality, their level of comfort, and their communication style to be able to be in synch with them. The entire session is a dance, where I ask and listen, probe and observe, with the only purpose of gaining insight in somebody else perceptions, thoughts, and expectations. It’s always a fascinating journey.
My team had never observed a user research session before. They told me how impressed they were with my ability to remain neutral and engaged throughout the session. I looked at them puzzled and I thought, "Of course. This is the way it is. Why, is there another way to interview people?"
This made me think. Obviously, there are interview techniques you can use to ask questions and probe people to reduce bias and improve your chances to gain insight into your test participants’ behaviors and expectations. Usability 101. But I believe that the magic of understanding another person is not just a matter of technicality. It requires to suspend for a moment our ego-centered way to interpret the world and open up to a different interpretation. In a way, it’s about love.
Do you remember that time you fell madly in love with somebody? Or when your child was born? The other became the object of unlimited interest and fascination. You perceived everything the loved one did or said as something special and unique. When you are in love, you want to know everything about the other person, almost to absorb his or her essence. For just a moment, you are more interested in them than in yourself.
If you can temporarily fall in love with your test participants, and find in yourself that sense of wonder in discovering another person’s perceptions, thoughts and feelings, you will not be so tempted to superimpose your opinion, preconceptions, and biases to what you are observing. Because suddenly the person in front of you is so much more interesting than any of your own opinions.
There is something wonderful in experiencing somebody else’s world. You understanding expands, you suddenly see something you could not see before. And there is no going back.
I know that many practitioners will disagree with me. It’s obvious that research should be some kind of cold and objective data collection technique, not a sudden emotional connection with the object of your study. And "love" is a word that should never be used in a business context. But when you are trying to understand human experience, a measuring tape may not be the best tool for the job.
October 8, 2005
I totally agree Antonella. To me, it can never be wrong to make an emotional connection with someone…even a stranger, and experiencing their world. It broadens everyone’s lives in the process. Nice post.
October 17, 2005
That’s a great description of that feeling. I’ve been in that headspace, but I’ve never done it, well, on purpose … I like this idea of letting yourself get there explicitly.
And lots of practices demand that practitioners emotionally engage (or disengage) in a particular way in order to achieve the practical result of neutrality.
I suspect, too, that the wonder and excitement that shows in body language and tone when the interviewer is truly interested and engaged is something you can’t fake, and it provokes much more enthusiasm and openness and *trust* from the subject.
October 17, 2005
I was the receiver of the “love” Antonella describes when I delivered my son in Phoenixville Hospital 28 years ago. The nurse in the labor room sat at my bedside and for many hours focused solely on me. I still remember her face and the quiet confidence she gave me, just by her complete attention. I was a fantastic experience, in no small part due to this woman’s work.
October 17, 2005
Awesome. I just blogged your story at http://chittahchattah.blogspot.com/2005/10/love-your-test-participants-more-than.html
December 9, 2005
You’d make a great therapist….
December 27, 2005
I just found your site today. I love your writing style, very cool!
This article says the same things as your one on women in the corporate workplace. “They” want the cold impersonal workplace, focus on business, no relationships or feelings – and that is exactly what women do – relationships and feelings – and have brought to the workplace.
I bet that in a psych study when they do the cold and impersonal interview, that syle affects the way the ‘subject’ behaves, and thus the outcome of the interview or study. But…of course, they don’t realize this, since cold and clinical is susposed to mean just facts.
They forget that being human is a relationship and how we are treated affects us and our ‘output’. Which means that what most studies actually study are only the effects of relationship styles, and not whatever they think they are studying 😉
January 1, 2006
Is it wrong to love someone more than you love yourself? I’ve read all of these wonderful thoughts…..but could someone plz tell me….I am in deep, deep, love with someone now. And he asked me that question, and i don’t really know what to say or answer him because of my feelings. A part of me is saying yes that i do love him more than myself. But is that a bad thing?
February 27, 2006
Hi mam\ Sir
how to give the answer in 1 minted regarding about the interview again with in 1 mint
REgards
Suresh