Please forgive our appearance…

Yes, I know. I’m having a hell of a time keeping my blog updated and I really miss blogging. Starting to work at Google felt as uneventful as being hit by a train. Changing city, adjusting to my commute, and in three months traveling to the West Coast twice, and to Italy once. Frequent travelers will say “so, what?” but for me it was enough displacement to make me sick for two months (that and the warm winter, which everybody seems to have suffered from).

Google is a place full of really smart people moving really fast and for the first two months it felt like I was running like crazy just to keep the pace with everybody else; and breathing hard while running. Now that I’m getting used to the environment, the anxiety has settled, and I’ve learned enough to function, I’m enjoying it a lot. [And I confirm again: the food is fantastic, even for NYC standards.]

All this has changed me somehow. I feel freer and and I’m a lot more confused (The title of Barbara Sher’s book, I could do anything if I only knew what it was, comes to mind), which makes writing really difficult. I have all this raw stuff spinning in my head and in my soul; the dust has not yet settled and it’s hard to see clearly. (And yet, sometimes I have flashes of pure clarity, where things seems sharper and in focus than they have never been before).

So, I’m going to post a sign on my blog that says: “Please forgive our appearance as we regain clarity and perspective.”